


eb and flow (a point of decline and a gradual change)

by babsaros



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alien Character(s), Alien Planet, Angst, Blood and Injury, Claustrophobia, Emetophobia, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Gen, Gunshot Wounds, Hurt/Comfort, Lance (Voltron) Has ADHD, Lance (Voltron)-centric, Lance Angst, Langst, M/M, Scars, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Sacrifice, Sharpshooter Lance, diplomat lance, god pls draw fanart for me, i worked on this forever, i wrote this right after season two came out and i was lowkey salty, lance but he has character development, lance is a good shot it's canon and im happy, like it's there but it's not the focus, soft klance, tentatively also tagging this, they/them pronouns for the whole alien race, very tentatively
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-23
Updated: 2017-02-26
Packaged: 2018-09-26 10:04:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9885689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/babsaros/pseuds/babsaros
Summary: It starts out as a regular mission- get in, check out the distress beacon, get out. Except things don't go as planned. And honestly, when do they ever?In which Voltron gets framed for murder… and then actually does murder people. like a lot of ppl. Like cmon guys chill out.feat. claustrophobic self-sacrificial self-deprecating Lance who's actually pretty capable and a good shot but has horrible homesickness and feels inadequate aka more char development than he got in season 2 :)))credit to my beta superspreegirl89 on ffn because they did so much heavy-lifting honestly i'm so grateful bc i'm so bad about keeping consistent tense!!





	1. waxin and wanin

**Author's Note:**

> i lov e sweet comments, i live to please  
> posting this in lil chunks every day, so stay tuned lmso i'm milking this for all it's worth.

It had started out normally, by space standards. Routine, by their standards. 

“Pidge, watch your six.” Keith sounded at ease, even as he dodged a large blast from a cruiser on his left. 

“Shit, thanks,” Pidge said and did a loop to get behind the cruiser on her tail. 

“Language,” Shiro reminded her. He didn’t sound like he meant it, but there was an edge to his voice.

All in all, it hadn’t been a bad day. Allura was being merciless with their training though, and the tension in the comms was high as everyone tried to avoid being blasted out of the sky.  So, was it really Lance’s fault that he decided to have some fun? He couldn’t help it honestly. Sessions like this where everyone was on edge made his skin crawl. Blue purred in the controls at his hands, and he sent her a silent little thanks, but even that wasn’t enough to keep him under control as he took her through evasive maneuvers. 

He wasn’t doing too badly, actually. Blue stepped in whenever he didn’t react quite fast enough, but the edge of a blast singed their back leg. It hardly shook them, but he threw Blue into a nosedive and she followed willingly. He could almost swear she was laughing. 

“Mayday, mayday, we’re going down!”

“Lance?” Pidge had already caught onto what he was doing, and her voice was conflicted between warning and playing along. 

“We’re hit captain!” He pulled Blue up again and they swerved into elaborate and totally unnecessary fancy flying, weaving in between the other lions, around the cruisers, and generally being an agent of chaos all the while he made shitty sound effects with his mouth. It felt like he had let Blue loose, but at the same time she was giving him the reins. They moved in harmony, smoother than they had before. It was euphoric. And absolutely fucking hilarious. They made a tight circle around Keith’s lion before zipping away. Red whipped around to look at them and Keith shouted.. 

“Lance!”  _ Knock it off _ , he meant. Lance waved at Keith through the windshield, and then his stomach was dropping as Blue fell backwards. She was playing with him just as much as he was playing with the others. His hands blinked back to the controls and he laughed as he righted her and took her back into the sky. 

She gave him an absolutely immature idea- and he took his hands off the controls, shouting into the comms.

“I’ve lost control of the ship, captain!” Blue took off, flying erratic. Hunk yelled as Blue whizzed past him, throwing off his shot at a cruiser, but it dissolved into a chuckle. Blue was just showing off now, as she baited two cruisers in close before pouncing on one. Lance got an up-close look at it through the viewport for a second as she tore into it and then chucked it back at the other one. They collided and the momentum pushed them off course, flying past the green lion before falling out of the air. 

“That nearly killed me!” Pidge snapped. 

“She’s helping!” There was a grumble from Pidge and suddenly she was making a bee-line for Lance. Blue dived again, and Lance realized he was incredibly light-headed at this point. Green was right on their tail, and Blue was pushing even faster. The others were still above him, trying their best to defend against the cruisers and ignore Lance. That made him hesitate, but Blue was already rushing back up into the clouds. Pidge wandered away from the chase, called back by Allura telling them to focus over the comms. Blue slowed to making lazy circles around the group. 

“A little help would be nice, Lance.” Keith sounded on the edge of annoyance.

“Blue, what do you think? Should we help Mr. Grumpy-pants?” He laced his voice with a tease. Blue roared in answer. 

“What did she just say about me?” Keith would be the one to pick a fight with a giant metal lion.

“She says you need to use the magic word.” He really didn’t mind bickering with Keith like this. It was fun to get him flustered. Tiptoeing the line between fighting and, well, flirting. He would never call it that though. Least of all to Keith. He’d die before it came to that.

“For fu- Come on, Lance, please!”

“Actually, the magic word is abra-” Just then, a cruiser appeared in Red’s blindspot. Blue lurched forward, but the cruiser had already gotten off a few shots. Keith cursed and whirled to destroy the thing, but that left Shiro’s flank open to another cruiser. The black lion reeled at the attack, knocking into Hunk, who had flown just a little too close. Lance blanched at the domino effect and Blue froze midair. 

“Lance, can you just concentrate for once?” Lance blinked at Shiro’s tone, his stomach suddenly turned to stone. He didn’t sound angry, just… disappointed. Exasperated. Irritated. The black lion flew until it faced Blue head-on and Lance wanted to crawl out of his skin. 

“I-I’m sorry-” There was a lump in his throat. He felt a twinge of anger in his gut, but mostly just guilt. And embarrassment. He felt like a little kid, getting scolded for not doing his chores or something, but somehow much worse. 

“People get killed when you slack off like that.”

“I know, I’m sorry, I just- I’m sorry. It won’t happen again, Shiro.” He wanted to be angry. He really really wanted that nauseous feeling to go away. But Shiro was right. People got hurt when Lance goofed off. Blue was trying to say something to him. Something comforting, something like both an apology and support, but he pushed her out. They went back to training. Later, he would realize he had been clutching the controls so tight his fingers had cramped up.  

  
  


It was about noon when Allura called them together. The incident at training had faded to a sour memory, and Lance was back to his old self. He walked into the command center with an arm slung around Hunk. The others were already there, Allura and Shiro already talking. 

“Lemme guess, aliens need saving?” He drawled.  Allura turned to face them, putting on her  _ i’m in charge, listen up _ look.

“We’ve received a distress beacon.” She always sounded slightly too positive, considering she was probably about to send them into a battle.

“Damsel in distress beacon?” It earned him a soft elbow to the ribs from Hunk and an eyeroll from Pidge. Allura ignored the comment and Coran jumped in to start telling them all about the planet. It didn’t seem too risky, there was a breathable atmosphere and the society was actually pretty technologically advanced. Except that there were no signs of the Galra anywhere near the coordinates. Lance stopped paying attention after that, figuring he had enough information. Besides, he’d just wing it.

They suited up, for the most part at ease, but that itch of nerves was sneaking in like it always did before a mission. He felt antsy, and from the glances the others traded, they felt the same. 

The plan was simple. Allura and Coran would stay in orbit, the paladins would fly down to the surface in their lions. They would all stay in contact over the comms, and if there was any trouble the castle would back them up. Easy peasy. The usual. Still, it was rubbing him the wrong way... He shrugged it off and made himself at ease in Blue. She settled over him with a soft, invisible weight.

It was a quick flight, and Shiro ran them through everything one more time. Lance was sometimes tempted to mute his comms in situations like this. He didn’t though. That’s the kind of impulsiveness that Keith would pull, and something in his chest always made him listen. Maybe it was his conscience, something deep inside whispering that if he stopped listening to them, even about little things, even once,  they would stop listening to him altogether. That wouldn’t be fun. 

Before he knew it they were entering the atmosphere. A sparkling city sprawled out beneath him and his craned his neck to see out the window. The rest of the planet seemed so plain compared to this. He saw towers, skyscrapers really, roads, billboards that flashed neons. It reminded him of Earth in a way, but different. Lots of things out here reminded him of Earth, but none of it was very close. Nothing could ever come close to home.

They landed on the outskirts of the city, and had barely made it out of their lions before something was approaching them. It looked like a little golf cart, hovering in the air, and unsteady over the rocky ground. Two beings hopped out of it, and Lance lifted an eyebrow. Only two? Five giant lions appear in the sky and you send a golf cart to go check it out? Keith caught his eye, thinking the same thing. Shiro stepped forward and the guards did the same, letting Lance get a better look at them. 

They were taller, not by much and not gangly either, but still tall enough to stand over Shiro. Their bodies looked masculine, but you could never really tell. Underneath the armor and helmets Lance saw pink skin, but the other guard had orange skin. Five fingers, no tails. For the most part they looked like one of the more humanoid aliens they had met. 

“State your name and intentions.” A weird accent. A message tapped out in morse code appeared across his visor. Pidge had forced them all to learn it so they could communicate wordlessly. 

_ “Who the fuck hasn’t heard about Voltron by now?”  _  Lance barely held in a snort and dismissed the message. If Shiro saw the message, he didn’t show it.

“We’re the paladins of Voltron,” Shiro began slowly, making sure his hands were visible to them. They shifted at the word Voltron but made no other moves. “We’re here because we intercepted a distress beacon. We just want to help.” Lance rolled his shoulders, the uneasy feeling in his gut growing. His fingers twitched over his bayard. The guards put their heads together and whispered for a moment, before one of them lifted their wrist to their mouth. It was straight from a spy movie. 

“Central Command, Nux and Raal reporting from the western edge. The visitors say they’re the,” they hesitated but finished. “Paladins of Voltron.”

There was a crackly silence for a beat. Then a deeper voice carried through the device.

“Voltron?” 

“Yes, sir. They say they received a distress beacon and come in peace.”

Another pause. “We have no records of a distress beacon being sent. Hold.” 

They stood around awkwardly for a minute. Lance was pretty sure they were about to be jumped, or something, or else he would have said something stupid. Keith kicked at the rocks and Pidge was rocking on the balls of her feet. Shiro shuffled uncomfortably. The sun was near setting, casting everything in orange, and he could swear the guards were glowing faintly. 

Finally a reply. “Bring them into base. They have clearance as Traders.”

“What about our lions?” Hunk spoke. The guards looked at him for a moment before the orange one spoke into their wrist again.

“Sir, they want permission to bring their aircrafts as well.” 

Lance sighed in relief as permission was granted. They loaded back into their Lions. It was slow going to follow the small cart but eventually they reached what Lance guessed was the “base”. He gave Blue a pat as he left her again. This time they were greeted by a much bigger party. 

“Welcome, Paladins of Voltron!” A stout alien in the front of the crowd stepped forward.

“Greetings.” Lance shot grins at a few of the aliens. The one in the front as well as some others weren't wearing armor, and he could see much more of their features. They were all varying neon colors, some with speckles, or small stripes. They had flat chests, and none had even a little bit of hair. Their brows were just raised ridges of skin, like a lizard. There was a pink, feminine looking alien in the crowd with speckles all across the left side of their face that blended together on the bridge of their nose to make spiral stripes under their right eye. Lance thought this one had the most interesting markings, but he was intrigued by it all. The leader that had greeted them was a neon yellow with only a few speckles at the top of their head. All the ones not in armor wore loose, flowy clothing, with sheer sleeves.

Shiro took the lead again. “Hello.” It was curt and Lance could tell Shiro was still on guard. 

“We have heard stories of you, but we never expected Voltron to actually grace us!”

“Then why send a distress beacon?” The pleasant expression on the leader's face flickered.

“We are looking into that. We have no records of a distress beacon being activated, however. In the meantime, you are our welcome guests. I am Glurb, leader of the Eb. Welcome to Ebsliel.”

“Thank you for having us. I’m Shiro, these are the other paladins.”

They introduced themselves, but the warm diplomacy didn’t match the feeling he got off these guys. Okay, yeah sure, there wasn’t a sign of even a single Galra there, besides Keith. And sure, they’ve been pretty cool so far. And Lance was definitely a sucker for a pretty face. And now they were being led to a feast? Still… Lance was uneasy. He composed a morse code message to the others.

_ “What are you guys thinking about this?” _ He sent it and immediately wrote another.  _ “Because I’m like, kinda suspish still.” _

Pidge shot a glance back at him over her shoulder. 

A message from Keith popped up.

_ “It’s shady. _ ” He rolled his eyes at the short reply.

_ “I guess we just follow Shiro.” _ Hunk shrugged beside him. 

_ “Aight.” _

Shiro turned his head to look back at them all. Lance gave him a low thumbs up. 

But the further they traveled into the city the more there was to look at. Bright lights flashed on every surface. There were more hover cars that stopped to let the procession through, more aliens glowing. It was dark now, the sun a small sliver of orange in the distant horizon, but the city was lit up with neons. It was easy to forget his suspicion with so much to distract him. They got to what Lance assumed was a sort of City Hall where a large banquet table had already been set out. There was so much activity and bustle Lance thought he was going to start bouncing off the walls. The paladins sat near each other, where they could see all the exits, and official looking Ebians filled in the rest of the table. Glurb took the head with Shiro at his left.

The food they brought out definitely wasn't the worst thing he'd ever eaten on an alien planet at least. 

In the middle of the feast, a smaller Ebian approached Glurb. They whispered to each other for a moment and then Glurb turned to Shiro with a smile so wide Lance thought their face was going to split. 

“Excellent news, Paladins! We have discovered the source of the distress beacon!” Shiro caught their eyes before leaning forward to hear what Glurb had to say. The hall faded away as Lance strained to hear.

“It seems that there was a mishap of sorts. We trade very frequently with a number of other planets but in order to arrange meetings we have to send out beacons. However, in one of our most recent messages, the signal was scrambled. No doubt because of the moon.”

“The moon?” 

“The moon! The moon has a very strong magnetic pulse. Every night, when it passes over the city, everything goes a bit… chaotic. Nothing serious, though it seems that this time it warped a trade signal so much you intercepted it as a distress signal.”

Lance glanced across the table at Pidge and Hunk, who already had their heads together. The story sounded questionable to him, and he had learned that aliens were usually hiding something, but he was no expert in moons. Shiro shifted back in his chair, and looked to them, considering Glurb’s story. Pidge and Hunk finally looked back at him, and gave the tiniest of shrugs. Lance wished he had payed more attention when Coran had told them about the planet. But there was no way to contact Allura at the table with everyone watching them. He sent Shiro a message. 

_ “Go with it.” _

Shiro locked eyes with Lance. His heart was suddenly hammering in his chest at the tension in the room. Then Shiro turned back to Glurb. He smiled, bowing his head slightly. 

“Well, I’m glad there’s no trouble. We’re glad to have your hospitality.” 

“Will you be staying the night then?”

Coran and Allura had been coaching them in diplomacy. Pidge and Keith were far too clumsy, far too blunt. Not to mention bad table manners. Hunk was better, but he tended to get… intense. Shiro was the oldest and most mature of course, and they were all glad to let him take the lead most of the time. But sometimes he faltered. Lance had been, aside from dumb jokes and bad attempts to flirt, the most promising of the paladins. He knew how to talk. It’s what he’s always been good at. He knows how to get along with people. Even Keith sometimes.

At Shiro’s hesitation, Lance jumps in. 

“We would hate to impose, especially since we showed up without calling ahead, all for a false alarm.” He leans forward onto the table, taking Glurb’s attention from Shiro and oozing charm.

“You wouldn’t be imposing at all! We would be honored to have the paladins of Voltron spend the night here.”

A message popped up on his visor, interrupting him. The helmets were a burden but he was glad for the communication.

_ “Will we be able to contact Allura?”   _ His gaze flickered over to Pidge in confusion.

_ “The moon. If it really messes with signals, can we comm her?” _ Glurb was looking at them quizzically and Lance realized he had to say something. 

“Uh-”

“I’m not sure we can-” Keith butts in, his voice confrontational.

“We’re not prepared to stay overnight.” It takes most of his willpower not to elbow Keith in the ribs. 

“Nonsense, we will provide all you need!” Lance really wasn’t trying to drag the team into a sleep-away, but if the dude kept insisting- a quick glance around the table told him the rest of the team was thinking the same thing. Shiro spoke up again and Lance sat back. 

“Well, then, I suppose we accept the invitation.”

“Splendid!” The rest of the feast was a blur of food and faces, far too much to keep track of. Eventually it was all cleared away, and Glurb’s entourage led them to a large building. The inside looked like any hotel on Earth with the same shitty patterned carpet, too bright hallways, and chairs in the lobby no one would use. The only difference was that everything looked like someone had tried to combine motel chic, and the set of the Aliens movies. They were given three rooms on one of the top floors with keycards for all of them. The fact that the doors had locks should have been comforting, but it was a very small comfort. 

“Okay, who’s bunking with who?” Lance looked to Hunk, but he and Pidge exchanged a glance.

“Wait, seriously?” 

“Sorry, dude. Me and Pidge wanna try to fact check some of this stuff. Science, you know?” he shrugged. 

“Aw, dude! Then who-” Keith raised an eyebrow as the complaint died in his throat. He turned away, begging Shiro silently, but Shiro just raised his keycard.

“I got a single bed room. Sorry.” He didn’t look very sorry. And he didn’t look like he was willing to change bedrooms with anyone. Not that Lance would force him, but still. With a sigh, he turned back to Keith. It wasn’t as big a deal as he was making it, and he really didn’t mind that much, but there were appearances to keep up, you know. He gestured to their door.

“After you.”

“How polite.” Keith deadpanned and pushed into the room. The others weren't trying to hide their smiles as they left too. 

Lance sighed again and closed the door behind him. 

The room was decorated like the rest of the hotel with two beds pushed against the left wall. A large window across the room that no doubt looked over the city center. He crossed the room and went to look out it. The view was almost breathtaking. Almost. Neon lights lit up everywhere, and he studied several of the billboards around. He couldn’t read the language of course, but they were still interesting. The moon up above caught his attention. He wasn’t sure, but he thought it might be slightly yellow. A door opened and shut behind him, and he stepped out of the curtains. Keith was leaving the bathroom, water dripping from his face. 

“There aren’t any towels in there.”

“Were you trying to drown yourself?” Lance pointed to a rack outside the door, where a few hand towels hung. Keith ignored the comment but did take one of the towels and dry his face. Before either could say more, there was a knock at the door. Keith snapped to attention and went to look through the peephole. 

“It’s- an Ebling? Ebian?” Keith stumbled on the pronunciation. “A servant? I dunno.”

“Ooh, watch out. They might have a gun.” 

Keith opened the door a bit, just enough for Lance to see over his shoulder out into the hall. The Ebian held a pile of towels. They were a bright green color, but with a neon blue flush and markings. They were on the smaller side from what Lance had seen, but they were still taller than he was. The Ebian, not the towels.

“Apologies. We did not have your room ready, with such short notice. I have brought towels.”

“Oh- uh, thanks.” He took them from them, the neatly folded pile collapsing as he took them with one hand while the other held the door.

“And your bedclothes.” They offered him a smaller pile.

Keith hesitated. “It’s alright. I don’t think we’ll need any-”

“Yeah, I usually just sleep in the nude.” Keith whipped around to glare at Lance, before finally taking the clothes from the servant. 

“There will be another set in the morning.” They bowed and the door was shut.

“Dick.”

Lance ignored the insult. “They were cute.” 

“If you’ve got a thing for aliens.”

_ Ah, if only you knew, Keith. _ Lance smothered a laugh and caught the clothes Keith threw at him. 

“You gonna stay up all night on guard duty?” Lance asked. He was already pulling off his armor, but Keith stood by the door with his arms crossed.

“I’m not sure I could sleep, even if they weren’t creeping me out.” 

Lance set a wrist-guard on the nightstand. He didn’t feel very tired either. It was probably only 5 o'clock castle-time. He flopped onto the bed, half his armor still on. 

“What do you think the chances of them having a board game around here are?”

“About as likely as us not being murdered in our sleep.”

“That’s a bummer.”

“Are you really that bored?”

“Not bored, just- I dunno. Long day.” He heaved himself back up and finished removing the rest of his armor. Keith excused himself to the hallway before Lance could figure out a way to ask for some privacy, and for once he was glad the other boy was so aloof. The fabric the Ebian servant had given them was similar to what the Glurb had worn- sheer and loose in the same style as everyone else, but with golden embroidery. If Lance was going to murder someone, he wouldn’t let them wear his best clothes first. He paused in the middle of putting them on, catching a glimpse of himself. 

“Shit.” The back was sheer. The translucent fabric did little to hide the scar that blemished most of his spine. He clenched his jaw, panicking for a moment, before remembering that the servant had given them two outfits. He switched out the offensive top with the one Keith had abandoned on his bed. This one was a much better fit, and if he got to see Keith wearing the other shirt later, he wouldn’t complain. 

Semi-crisis averted, he grabbed his keycard and ducked his head into the hall. It was quiet, as most hotels are, but Keith and Shiro were talking a door down in front of Shiro’s room.

“Psst.” They looked up at him and he approached them. “What’s up?”

“Nice outfit.” Deadpan from Keith, and the flicker of a smile lit Shiro’s face. 

“Thanks, I thought you’d like it.” It wasn’t the most vulgar thing he could have come up with, but it still served to fluster Keith a little. 

“We’re figuring out a night watch.”

“I knew it.” He shot a look at Keith, who crossed his arms. “Call me when it’s something interesting.”

“Don’t complain when we haul you out of bed to make sure we don’t get killed tonight.”

“Don’t interrupt my beauty sleep.” He stuck out his tongue and Keith rolled his eyes as Lance walked away. He was immediately hit with a wave of relief that they couldn’t see his back. 

Pidge and Hunk were still wearing some of their armor, and they all sat in a circle on the floor in their room, wasting time until it really was time to sleep. True to his word, Keith was sitting in a chair watching the door when Lance slipped back into their room. They didn’t exchange banter this time as Lance shuffled past him to fall into bed. 

“D’you think they’ll have baby muffins for breakfast?” Keith snorted softly but didn’t reply. A sleepy smile found it’s way to Lance’s face. “Thanks for keeping me safe.” He thought he saw Keith turning to say something, but he was already burying his face in the pillow and fading to black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow it looks like the paladins might have gotten a break for once huh?? no
> 
> very rough sketches of what the Ebian outfits look like- http://babitty-art.tumblr.com/post/157093786401/some-quick-sketches-for-a-vld-fic-ive-been  
> don't take these as rigid, set designs tho, they are just doodles pal, thx


	2. high tide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> things r heatin up, but i'm not talking about keith

Lance woke with a crick in his neck, and drool in the corner of his mouth. Keith was standing over him. 

“Morning, Sleeping Beauty.”

“Fuck off,” Lance mumbled and curled deeper into the blankets.

“Your tiny muffins are waiting.” Lance groaned, but after living with Allura he was used to being forced out of bed before he was ready, especially when breakfast was on the line. He sat up, and wiped his eyes.

“We made it through the night, huh?”

“There wasn’t a sound.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

“It means we have to be on guard all day.” Lance considered this, but really, what evidence had they been given that these guys were bad? Aside from the distress beacon, which may or may not have even been sent, everything seemed pretty peaceful here. Even the servants seemed pretty well taken care of, and the city had trading agreements with other planets. 

“What are you thinking?”

Lance looked up, realizing he had been staring into space. “I dunno dude, I think we’re being too skeptical. If I was gonna kill Voltron, I would have done it while we were asleep.” Keith mulled over his words for a moment.

“Maybe…”

“Either way, breakfast.” Lance threw the covers up, and pushed out of the bed. The blankets on Keith’s bed were hardly wrinkled, and Lance wondered if he really had stayed up all night. 

He went through his morning routine as best he could without the comfort of his own bathroom. Like the servant last night had said, there was a new pile of clothes by the door. To Lance’s surprise, Keith actually took one of the outfits. 

“Cannot wait to see this,” he called across the room. Keith just grumbled, and locked the bathroom door. Despite what Lance had said, it didn’t feel right leaving his bayard in the room, but aside from a too small pocket at his hip there wasn’t really anywhere to store it in this outfit. He wondered if Ebians had purses, or if they just didn’t carry anything with them. The thought of hauling his bayard around in a purse made him chuckle to himself. He tucked his keycard into the pocket and left the room. Hunk and Pidge were standing in the hall, and he quickly joined them. The Ebians had mostly the same body shape from what he had seen, but the outfits Pidge and Hunk wore were still rather flattering. He suspected Pidge’s outfit was a child’s though. 

“Where’s breakfast?” They shrugged, and said they were just waiting on everyone else. They hadn’t been able to figure out much last night, but for the most part it seemed the trio was in agreement that they hadn’t really been given a reason to distrust the Ebians. If Pidge and Hunk were thinking the same thing as him, then he wasn’t being too trusting after all.

Shiro came out of his room after a moment, dressed in Ebian clothing as well, and Lance noted the bags under his eyes. Had he stayed up all night too? 

“I don’t like leaving our armor here.”

“Me neither.” Keith had appeared behind them. Lance did his best to ignore _ that  _ outfit.

“I don’t know if we have a choice. They were pretty pushy.” 

“I commed Allura earlier. She was worried, but I told her everything that’s happening. Coran looked into the moon thing.”

“What did he say?” Pidge practically jumped.

“He actually found quite a few sources from neighboring planets that support the story.” 

“So the distress beacon really was a mistake.” Hunk and Pidge looked almost disappointed.

“That’s what it looks like. And Allura says we did the right thing in staying the night. If we want the Eb as partners, and we probably do considering their reputation as traders, we need to watch our step around them.”

“Let’s just get breakfast and bolt.” They all nodded at Keith’s sentiment, and that was that. The team walked to the elevators together where the servant from last night already waited. They seemed entirely too cheerful, and had the kind of face Lance loved to look at. Okay, so he liked to look at a lot of faces, sue him. 

“My name is Blip! I’ll be escorting you to breakfast.” Shiro gave them a warm smile, and a nod as they all piled into the elevator. The ride down was short, and the commotion that waited them when they got to the ground floor was jarring compared to the silence of the rest of the hotel. Ebians rushed about. Servants hurried across the lobby, marked by the silver embroidery on their clothing, while Glurb and their entourage stepped forward as the elevator doors opened. 

“Paladins! Good morning. I trust you slept well?”

Shiro, who really hadn’t slept all night, laughed and lied in the same breath. “Like a rock.”

“Splendid!” They either liked that word a lot or didn’t know any others. “Everything fits alright?” They gestured to their outfits.

“Oh- yes, fine.” Glurb looked smug at that, like he had personally picked out each and every article of clothing. “However, we don’t plan to stay very long.”

“A quick breakfast and a very short tour of the city then.” Glurb winked and turned away before any of them could argue. A tour didn’t sound so bad, but none of them wanted to stay longer than they needed too. Even if the Eb were perfectly trustworthy, and there was no immediate threat, the team couldn’t really afford to take a vacation. Aliens to fight, galaxies to save, that kind of thing. Still, all they could do was shrug, and follow Glurb as he led them back to the feast hall from last night. It wasn’t nearly as lively now as it had been, and breakfast really was a small affair. Pidge and Hunk chatted with a scholarly-looking Eb about the trading they did, and even Keith had a short conversation with a servant about something or other. Lance shot a grin at the servant that brought him a plate of what looked like the Ebian equivalent of Eggo waffles, and they rushed away giggling. Other than that, he just enjoyed the food, and the fact that no one was shooting at them. 

There was only one thing that struck him as odd the whole time. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a servant drop a vase in the hall. No one else seemed to even notice the spill, nor flinch at the crash. But the servant went stiff. Another servant dived in to start cleaning the mess, and the first servant simply… wandered off. No, not wander. They seemed like they knew where they were going. And then the scene was gone, the second servant rushing off with a tray of the broken shards. He glanced around the table to see if anyone else had noticed, but all he got were questioning looks. He waved it off, in the end. What’s a broken vase to Voltron, after all? 

  
  


The tour around the city was pleasant, and he actually might have liked to explore it at his own pace. As it was, the most interesting things he saw were the things Glurb skipped over. The shopping district was a bustle of activity with merchants selling out of booths. He even saw some other aliens milling about in the midst of the Ebians. There were stalls of odd looking fruits, books and scrolls, machinery too. Hunk and Pidge pointed out a few things, and Glurb answered some of their questions. With a few bucks, and some free time they would have a field day in the market. They took a brisk walk through a park, the only thing that looked natural in the whole city. There were a few monuments that Glurb described in as dry a fashion as he could. On the off chance they ever came back, Lance made note of a few places he could find fun and trouble. They stopped in front of an imposing gray building, though from a certain angle it could have been considered as pretty as the rest of the city.

“What’s this?” Shiro’s question is innocent and his voice is warm. Entirely at odds with the feeling in the air there.

“This is the courthouse. A society cannot thrive without rules of course.” Glurb is matter-of-fact about it, but the look on their face was borderline creepy. Lance studied the building for a moment before Glurb shuffled them on. 

They only make it a street, or so, over before Glurb is stopped by a servant. They’re panting for breath, but they say something to Glurb, too quiet for the paladins to hear. Glurb looks alarmed for a moment, but they turn back to the paladins with a quick smile. 

“Ah, my guests, it appears that there’s a situation I must go deal with.”

“Trouble?” 

“No, no, nothing like that. Just a small accident.” They waved off Shiro’s offer. “I’ll be back shortly so we can finish the tour, and send you on your way.” And like that he was off, the entourage leaving with him, aside from two guards. Of course Lance was curious what the commotion was, but the sooner Glurb got back, the sooner they could leave, which meant no questions. The team exchanged looks, but stood in silence.

Lance was bouncing on his heels when Blip came to them, walking slightly faster than they needed to. 

“Paladins!” They eyed the guards. “Glurb has requested I escort you to the next destination while you wait.” They turned, and started walking, and neither paladin nor guard had a chance to question it. Blip led them to a rather small building, neatly nestled between a library and an repair shop. The guards pushed past the paladins.

“What is this?” Blip shrank under their questioning.

“Ah- Glurb is, Glurb is just in there. I’m only doing what was requested.” The guards look at each other before opening the door. One barely manages to get their head in the doorway before he goes crashing down to the ground. Blip grabs the other guards arm as he goes to pull his weapon, and suddenly another Ebian emerges, and is smashing the guard’s helmet. They join their comrade on the ground. 

“Quickly, pull them inside!” The new Ebian tells Blip. “Paladins, thank moon. Inside, inside!”

“What’s going on here?” 

“Please, off the street before someone sees! We have precious few moments before the diversion I created is discovered.” The Ebian is grabbing Shiro’s arm, pulling him inside, and the rest of the paladins follow without hesitation. They’re led into a room, deeper into the building, where Blip drags one of the guards into the corner. The other shortly joins them. The mystery Ebian releases Shiro, and turns to them. 

“My name is Rark. I sent the distress beacon.”

“Glurb said that it was an accident.”

“I know what Glurb said. That stupid story about the moon. It’s-” They make a sound Lance assumes translates to an swear. “Glurb and the others have been building that reputation for eons. It’s a cheap lie.”

“Fucking knew it.” Pidge says softly, and Lance sees her bump Hunk.

“So the moon hasn’t been jamming our comms?” 

“The moon is a moon. The only one interfering with comms and signals around here is Glurb. If you have anyone out there, Glurb is probably feeding them the same sort of story, or making threats.” Rark makes another swear, a low guttural noise.

“Wait, wait. Start from the beginning. Why send the beacon?”

“You haven’t seen it then. The amoral bits. The bits Glurb covers up. The whole system is corrupt. Servants killing themselves over the smallest mistakes so they don’t have to face the court. Entire families dying, because of the cruelty Glurb administers without blinking. It’s disgusting.” Rark pauses, rushing to the many filing cabinets shoved against the wall. The drawers are stuffed with papers, and they pull out a pile. They’re one of the plainer Ebians, a pinkish-orange with speckles across their nose, and tiger stripes along their jaw. They wave the papers around and continue. “Nobody wants to listen. They’re all either paid off, or choosing to be ignorant out of naivety. We needed help. We needed you, Paladins. They know I sent the beacon. They trashed my office, my home. I’m risking my life to save dozens of others.” Blip was at Rark’s side now, taking the papers from their hand. Lance’s head is spinning, because he knew it had been too good to be true, but to hear his suspicions confirmed was always disappointing, at the very least. Keith looked like he was ready to go take Glurb down by himself. Shiro was tensing his jaw in that way that meant war. If what Rark was saying was true, that Ebians were dying at the hands of their leaders, that meant they had a job to do. 

“It’s all in the court. It’s got the city twisted up in thorns. People view the cases like entertainment. It’s sick!” Venom dripped from their voice and Blip laid a hand on one of Rark’s. How long had they been working together, trying to get someone to help them? 

That’s what Lance was thinking when the shot fires into the room. Rark is on the floor before he can blink, and the blood…The air leaves his lungs. Blip screams, over the sound of guards storming the building, over the gasps and shouts of the other paladins.

“I do wish you hadn’t witnessed any of this.” Glurb waves their gun at the room decorated with stray documents, not the body on the floor. And then they point it at Blip, and fire. The bullet enters their side, and there’s a small gurgle before they slump over too. Lance’s hands zip to where his bayard usually is, only to grasp empty air. 

“It’s a shame. Rark used to be a very talented scientist. But then all this nonsense, and unpleasantness had to occur.” Glurb tuts softly. 

“You-” Keith starts on Glurb.

“Lance-” Shiro warns and steps toward him, and Lance turns, but the guard behind him is faster and Lance falls to the floor with the blow to his head, and blacks out. 

His eyes flicker open only a few moments later, and he pushes himself up onto his elbows, blinking away stars, and trying to make sense of the commotion in the room. The others are fighting, trying to wrestle away weapons. There are nails scraping against his scalp suddenly and he's yanked up by his hair. He yelps, a headache already pounding in the back of his skull. He scrambles to sit up, and then the barrel of a gun is pressed to his temple. He goes stiff, forgetting the painful tugging at his hair. He gets out a single “shit-” before someone- Glurb -begins talking over him and the rest of the chaos in the room.

“Now, now, Paladins. Let’s calm down.”

The others hesitate for the briefest second and the grip on his hair tightens and his head is smashed into the wall and he chokes out a noise of pain. They all jump, looking ready to tear into someone's throat. Tears sting his eyes ,and he’s cursing himself for getting stuck in this position. Cursing Glurb. There’s an awful lot of blood on the ground. The room is too cramped, too many bodies on the ground. The weapons are being put down. And suddenly the other paladins are being pushed to their knees, their hands behind their backs, and they’re all being filed out the door. There’s something playing over a speaker system outside, something that sounds like both a tornado siren, and a victory song all at once. His head throbs so painfully it’s almost hard to keep steady on his feet, and he hears his name up ahead, from Keith or Hunk, or maybe he imagines it. All he can think about is the billboards all around.

Instead of the bright neon and cheerful messages from before, they now all show an angry red background with large white letters. Voltron is the only word he can pick out, here and there. He gets the gist. They're public enemies now.  


They’re being loaded into a hovervan now, and one of the guards shoves Pidge a little too roughly. She stumbles into Lance from behind, and he nearly falls flat on his face. A guard tightens their grip on his arm and keeps him upright. He glances backward, but Pidge seems okay. His stomach does a flip seeing the inside of the van. It’s too small, with too many guards. He’s going to suffocate in there. There’s nothing he can do though, as the guards haul him in. It’s too dark, his head hurts too much, he’s too panicked. Without thinking he tugs on his bindings, earning an extra _thwap_ to his head from the guard at his right. He stiffens, but then there’s a foot nudging his from across the aisle, and he vaguely makes out Hunk’s shape in the darkness. 

_ Okay, okay, breathe. _ He can do this. He can make it through. 

Before too long the van is stopped again, and the door opens, light flooding in and blinding him. They’re all yanked out, and led into a building. It’s the courthouse. Through the large doors, winding through hallways, and down flights of stairs. Abruptly, they’re all being led in separate directions. 

“Wait-”

“No, stop-” 

Their objections fall on deaf ears, they’re shouting each other’s names, and Lance can’t even see them anymore, though he’s nearly wrenching his shoulder out of it’s socket trying to look back. He’s pushed roughly into a small cell, and the door clangs shut behind him. There’s no windows, only a shitty dim bulb on the high ceiling. The cell was maybe seven by five feet, barely enough room to pace. But, Lance can’t sit still. He can’t hear anything past the door. He tries calling their names a few times, but if there’s a reply, the sound dies before it can reach him. The door is sturdy, despite it’s worn-down look. There’s nothing but walls. 

  
  


He’s slumped in the corner when a tray of food slid into a slot that opens and closes before Lance can move. The food is a stark contrast to breakfast, and dinner in the banquet hall. Small, cold servings of something he doesn’t recognize as anything. In fact, he’s not sure it’s even food, even after taking a few reluctant bites. He’s trying his best to keep track of time. It was before noon when... everything happened. As far as he can tell he’s been stuck in here for maybe an hour. He pushes away the tray, and leans back into the corner. The knot on the back of his head is killing him.

  
  


The waiting is the worst part. A small part of him worries that maybe the others have already figured out how to escape, and they’re leaving him behind. Another part worries that maybe no one will ever come for him, that he’ll be left to rot in this cell. He’d rather be dragged off to the executioner. He’s managed to get his heads in front of him though, tied as they are. All he had was the ability to drum his fingers on the floor.

  
It had been hours. He was trying to think of a way to kill himself with the lunch tray, on the chance that he really is left here forever, when they do finally open the door. His core froze as he stared up at the guards. They seize him, roughly, and tug a hood over his head. It’s all he can do not to trip over his own feet as they lead him away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the abuse begins i love to hurt lance thanks for readin


	3. total eclipse of the heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lance is my favorite hurricane

A cry escaped him as he was shoved down, his knees smashing into the hard floor. And then the hood was yanked off. There were gasps from either side of him, both delight and horror. The room was only dimly lit, but he still had to blink a few times before his eyes adjusted. He was on a platform only big enough for him, and two guards. From the walk up the stairs, he’d guess it was maybe fifteen feet up. In front of him was an even taller platform, and he had to crane his neck to meet the eyes of a judge. They sneered down at him, purple speckles under their eyes. To his left, down below him was a stand of masked Ebians, all dressed so extravagantly that if Lance had been asked to describe one he wouldn’t have been able to. His eyes danced from gaudy detail to gaudy detail. They looked at him eagerly, and it made his stomach churn. He looked away to his right. Another identical stand, except this one was filled with guards- and the other paladins. His heart nearly stopped. He looked back to the crowd on his left. Anything was better than seeing the fear on their faces. That would be burned in his mind until he died. Which would probably be very soon. The judge launched into a speech, and Lance started. He never thought he would hear his name in the same sentence as the words “treason”, “terrorism”, and “first-degree murder of a federal official, and attempted murder of civil servant”. Blip was still alive then, but who knows for how long?

Lance was finding it hard to breathe, hot and cold flashes running down his spine. He wanted his hands free, wanted to be able to do something with them.

There was sudden movement at his right, a muffled shout that cut off and turned into a groan. A titter of excitement from the Ebians. Lance chanced a look. Keith was crumpled on the floor, the guard nearest to him holding the butt of their gun over his head. Lance clenched his jaw. Pidge was crying. Shiro was attempting to help Keith up, get between him and the guards. Hunk was looking straight at Lance. They locked eyes for half a second, far too long for Lance to bear. The Judge cleared their throat impatiently, waiting for the small interruption to finish. Lance stared at the floor of the platform for the rest of their very long-winded speech. He hated when people talked for too long, especially when he already knew what was going to happen in the end. He was going to die. A part of him was still warring with this idea, but it was being smothered by apathy. He was never very important anyway, never good enough. Always messing up. Maybe he should be put out of his misery. He wanted to laugh. He wanted to stop fighting. He wanted to-

“Do you have any last words?”

His eyes caught the faint traces of blood in the cracks of the wood. Last words? He had always been good at talking. But, looking over at his team, his friends, the words died in his throat. What could he even say? The only sound in the room was faint rustling from the stand at his left. 

“There’s just so much.” Hunk shook with a silent sob. Lance hated that, he hated seeing Hunk cry. Hunk didn’t deserve this. “Hunk.” He didn’t care that his voice was cracking.

“Hunk, I love you. I love you so much, you deserve so much better. You’re smart and kind and you were the best friend I ever had and I loved you so much.” His heart was aching so much he thought he might wither and die without any outside help. “And Keith?”

He barked out a bitter laugh. “Keith, I’m in love with you! I’ve been in love with you for so long, and I’m sorry that I’m just now saying it. You just  _ never _ stop fighting. You’re so strong, and you’re so much better than me, at  _ everything _ , oh god.”

Keith says his name, small and subdued. Lance talks over him. He has to get it all out, or else he’s going to burst. “I’m sorry for giving you shit all the time, I’m sorry we never talked, I really, really just want to talk to you. A-and Shiro, you’re- god, you’re my hero. I know I’m an idiot and I don’t pay attention sometimes, and I know I let you down but,” He stumbled for words. “I love you man, I just- I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” He felt like he was drowning, and was vaguely aware that he was crying and making a fool of himself. He went on, trying to ignore their faces. 

“Pidge, you’re so goddamn smart, and- and talented, and I want you to get out of here and go find your family.”

“You’re all so good. I love you so much. I was just never fucking good enough, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so-” He’s the only sound in the room. It gushes out, in ugly sobs and he knows his face is a mess. It pours out of him, all the grief, and fear, regret and guilt. It racks his entire body, tears its way out in screams of apology. Until all he’s left with is a snotty nose, and a bloodstained floor. The floor is the only thing that seems real right now. He’s not sure he even has a body anymore. Maybe all the screaming has unraveled it, and he’s turning into the stars. That would be nice.

The Judge clears their throat again. “If you’re quite finished making a mess of my courtroom, we’ll move on.” There’s snickering at his left.

Lance can’t even make himself feel angry. He just follows the Judge’s hand as they gesture to a guard. The guard steps up to him, so close that Lance could lean against their shins. He follows those legs up, to the barrel of a gun, and then his eyes shoot themselves back to the floor. The Judge starts into the final part of their speech. Lance’s throat is dry, and he’s so far disassociated from the scene that all he can think about is what kind of gun he’s going to be killed with. It’s familiar, and he vaguely remembers Hunk rambling about it earlier in the city. At the market. Yeah. Yeah, it’s the newest model. It weighs more than he does but the firepower more than makes up for the weight. A little extreme for an indoor execution, but then again, this is supposed to be entertaining. One shot is all it takes. One shot. One- 

His eyes widen in realization, that one small part of him still denying death. The gun only has one shot. It’s a show-off gun. Recharging takes at least 10 seconds. That would be...enough? If he… But the paladins. Sure, Keith just tried to break loose, but that was Keith, hotheaded and without backup. Besides, what other choice do they have? 

Death. That’s the choice they have.

They’ll have to be ready. Slowly, painfully slow, he looks to their box. He just needs a moment of eye contact. They’re all looking at the ground. He wills them to notice him, just this once, please, please notice him without him having to make noise. 

And Hunk does. 

It’s a fleeting, watery glance, but he notices Lance staring. Lance hardly dares to breathe. His eyes flicker from Hunk to the guard, and Hunk follows his gaze. Lance silently taps against the platform with his fingertips, spelling as quickly as he can. 

_ Wait. Idea. Ready.  _

Hunk watches before slowly, almost imperceptibly nodding. He nudges Shiro slightly with his elbow, and Shiro looks up. Lance watches the paladins slowly, silently get ready, warn each other. Prepare. Lance feels like every inch of his body is vibrating, humming a silent war song. He drops his face back to the floor, and swallows hard. The Judge recites the concluding sentences. The crowd at his left leaned forward, excited. The guard raised the barrel of his gun up. If Lance is off by even a tick, he’s dead. The moment stretches into eternity. And then, just as they squeezed the trigger, Lance swept his leg to the side and ducks, knocking the guards feet out from under them. Their shot goes wide, and Lance heard glass shatter, and screaming as it rained down on the spectators in the stand. He tuned it out, rocking backwards, and knocking the other guard off the platform. Then he threw himself onto the guard in front of him, biting into their neck as hard as he can. The guard shoved at him with a scream, and Lance released them before smashing his forehead down on their nose. In a second, the guard was gushing blood and Lance left them to their pain. He grabbed the abandoned gun with his still-bound hands.The high-pitched hum of its recharge set his teeth on edge as he aimed the barrel up at the Judge. Their eyes widened in surprise, the gun beeped, and Lance pulled the trigger. The recoil sent him backwards, his head slamming into the floor. He blinked away the spots and sat up at the same time the guard did. The gun began humming again, and the guard staggered over Lance, blood dripping onto their armor. Lance kicked them in the shin. They stumbled a bit, just enough for Lance to push himself upward, and use the gun like a battering ram. The guard fell backwards again, and Lance stole the small pistol from the holster on their belt. 

He fired it, point-blank. Lance pushed himself up with his elbows, dropping the pistol for the knife strapped to the guards leg. It was awkward, and he nicked his wrist in haste, but the bindings came off. He grabbed the pistol, and stood on unsteady legs. He turned just in time to meet the guard running up the stairs at him. He raised the pistol, and fired without thinking, the body toppling backwards over the side of the railing. He glanced down at his team, who for the most part had taken out the guards, unarmed as they were. But Keith was about to be blind-sided by a guard. Lance took the shot, and Keith looked up at him. It was hard to read his expression. 

More guards started storming through the courtroom doors. The other paladins would have to go through a different door on the balcony, but Lance ran down the stairs, and jumped the railing the last few feet, landing next to the body of the guard he’d just shot. He raised the pistol at a guard rushing him, but realized with a jolt that there was no ammo left. He scrambled backwards, tripping over the corpse. As he slammed into the ground, he heard his name from the balcony. A gun was thrown over the edge, and skidded across the floor, stopping a foot short of him. He grabbed it with barely time to get his finger on the trigger before the guard was trying to wrestle the gun away. A short struggle ensued, a few wild shots fired into the ceiling, before Lance was able to put the barrel against the guards chest and pull the trigger. He heaved the body off of himself, panting for breath. There were more coming. This gun was smaller than the one aimed at his head earlier, but it could still do some damage, and it didn’t need to recharge. Lance wished he had his bayard but he was thankful to have a weapon at all. 

 

The next few minutes were a blur of shooting, running, narrowly dodging guards before slipping out into a hallway. He ran blindly, not sure where it would let out, sweat dripping into his eyes. Guards in twos or threes ran at him, but for the most part they were terrible shots, not trained for resistance. No one had ever caused any violent disturbances before the paladins got there. The paladins. He had no idea where they could be. Their door had been on the opposite side of the courtroom, and Lance had taken quite a few turns since then. A part of him worried that he had walked in a circle, but another part reassured him that no, he was headed out. The adrenaline was making him feel dizzy, but clear all at once. Somehow he knew he was going roughly toward an exit. He had found it hard to concentrate during their initial tour, but now he was somehow confident in the map in his head. He took a left, following his gut. Hearing movement, he swung himself back around the corner. Deep breath, Lance. The sound of footsteps, panting, and low talking. He counted to three in his head, then stepped around the corner, finger on the trigger. 

“Lance!” Hunk picked him up in a hug so tight he could barely breath. 

“H-hunk?” His feet touched the ground again. 

“Are you okay?” Lance looked at Shiro and let the relief fully wash over him. 

“Yeah- Yeah, I-”

He was cut off by Keith. The boy pushed past Hunk and pulled Lance in by the sheer fabric of his shirt before he had time to move. The kiss was firm. He tasted like sweat and cheap lip balm. Keith released him and took a half-step back. Lance blinked.

“You should have said something earlier, you idiot.” A slow grin spread over Lance’s face and he laughed. He forgot the way his legs ached, forgot the weight of the gun in his hands, forgot the blood smeared on his shirt.

Pidge wrapped her arms around his waist, burying her face in his torso. 

“You’re family too, Lance.”

The hall went silent. His throat went tight and he pulled away from Pidge slightly. She looked up at him, snotty nose and gleaming eyes. Her glasses had a small crack through one lens, a result of their escape. 

“I, uh…” He remembered all the things he’d said on the platform, and wished he’d said both more and nothing at all. If they got out of here alive, how could he face them? 

Before he could paint himself anymore the fool, a pair of guards rounded the corner behind the team. He shoved Pidge away, and shot one of them, but the other smashed Shiro’s shoulder with a baton. Keith raised his own stolen gun, the first shot missing by an inch, but the second shot tore through the guard’s neck. They slumped to the ground. 

“Shiro, you good?” Shiro grimaced but nodded, rubbing his shoulder. 

“We gotta go. This way.” Lance turned on his heel, grateful to postpone the talk. They jog in silence, aside from their footsteps and the sound of their hearts pounding in their ears. Lance was becoming increasingly worried that his sense of direction was wrong, when they finally see it. The twisting halls have lead them to a back exit. There’s one side door between them and it though, and they can hear someone inside the room. The group slowed to a halt outside. He turned to the team and mouthed a countdown. On one, he whipped in front of the doorway, two shots hitting the two closest guards who go down before they know what happened. The last guard ducked behind a table and Lance’s shot whizzed over their head. The guard fired blindly, and Lance stepped to the other side of the doorway. There’s another shot fired into the hall, and Lance took the chance to duck his head back in, and spray cover fire over the table. Keith slipped through the door silently, looking entirely too smooth as he hopped the table. There was a scuffle, and Keith popped his head up again. He wiped a knife against something with a frown before picking up the guns in the room, and rejoining the group in the hall. He handed the weapons off to Pidge, and Shiro, who had been unarmed. Lance nodded at him, and they advance to the exit. Keith and Pidge stand to the side, and Lance kicked the door open, just like in the movies. There were no guards outside and he sent a silent thank you to the universe for that. He didn’t know how much ammo he had left, and they still had to get to the lions. It was getting dark. Soon, the whole city would be out looking for them. Footage and news from the courtroom probably plastered on every billboard from here to the other side on the planet. Lance grit his teeth, and the team followed him outside. This was going to take a miracle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright alright alriaaighht


	4. the low tide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> blood and emetophobia warnin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> good angst good angst good angst aaaaa

They’d been running for at least twenty minutes through alleys, and under bridges. Lance had a stitch in his side and his whole body burned from strain. He was exhausted, emotionally and physically. But they were close to the city center, and then it was just a little further to the airfield where the lions were.

It had been awhile since they’d seen anyone, taking out only a handful of guards since the courthouse. The adrenaline was wearing off, but pure fear was icing into his veins. He felt jittery, but more than anything he just wanted to lie down. The other paladins looked like they shared the sentiment. At Shiro’s cue, they take a moment to catch their breath.They cram under a bridge where it was dim, and a little damp. Lance leaned into the wall, and let his arms drop, fingers loose on his gun.

“Shit.” His eyes snapped open, and Keith was staring at him. “You’ve been shot.” The statement took a second to register, and Lance didn’t believe him.

“What? Where?” He patted himself down, realizing that the stitch in his side was a ragged hole. It wasn’t bad, but deep enough that blood had caked his shirt, and was still flowing. His breath caught in his throat. He hissed a swear, feeling his legs go wobbly.

“B-back at the courthouse- the last guard, they must’ve- fucking- lucky shot.” His brain was piecing it together without thinking. Hunk put a hand on his shoulder, holding him steady as he stared at the wound in bewilderment.

“Can you walk?” Shiro looked like he was going to pick him up then and there, even with a bruised shoulder.

“Breathe, Lance,” Hunk said and Lance realized he started hyperventilating. They were so goddamn close to getting out of there. Pidge stepped forward, and moved his hands away from his side. Then she tore at the hem of her shirt with her teeth, a strip ripping from the fabric. In a moment, she had a strip long enough to wrap around Lance’s side twice. She bunched up his own shirt around the wound, the baggy fabric working in their favor, and went to work. It felt weird for someone else to fidget at him like this. The makeshift bandage caused the slightest twinge of pain, and it looked about as pretty as he felt , but it was they best they had.

“Can you walk?” Shiro repeated the question, and Lance paused before nodding. He had to walk. He had to be able to carry his own weight. “We can wait longer if you need to.” Lance shook his head, giving them a thumbs up. He doesn’t trust himself to speak. He’s done enough of that today. The doubt was evident on their faces, but they didn’t press it further. A pinky wrapped around his own, and he gave Keith a weak smile.

The group wiped their brows and pressed on.

  


They found their way into a network of tunnels beneath the city. The sewers, obviously. It stinks, but at least it wasn’t out in the open. Lance just hoped he wouldn’t die of dysentery before they got back to the surface. His side felt like it was on fire, and the bandage was a bit loose, but he couldn’t stop. He pushed himself to keep moving, every footstep a firework in his ribs, and then a split second of numbness before the next step. The tunnels were too dark, and he was  afraid he was going to slip. He felt too confined, and he tried to hold down the panic, but he swore the walls were closing in.

Every so often, they’d stop, and whisper about which direction to head. Every so often, one of them would turn, and look at him, the worry in their eyes reflecting in what little light filtered down. He didn’t have to try very hard to tune them out. Everything felt a bit blurry, and his stomach was turning itself over.

Shiro signaled them to stop, and Lance took the opportunity to lean against the wall, not caring about the dirt. A cold sweat that ran down his back soaked into his shirt.

“We should be right under the airfield now.” The others crouched in a circle a few feet away from him. Shiro continued laying out a plan. If he had a stick, and some dirt, he’d probably draw a map.

The tunnels were choking the life out of Lance. Their voices fade away, leaving him with nothing but nausea. He couldn’t breathe, he felt so lightheaded. He stumbled away from the wall.

He retched until there was  a small puddle at his feet. His throat burned. His ribs hurt so badly he thought he might fall over, and as he straightened up, the world spun.

“Lance!” Someone caught him, and then slowly lowered him to the ground, back against the wall. He closed his eyes, finding it not worth the energy to keep them open. Something soft pressed at his side as the bandage shifted.

“He’s lost a lot of blood.”

“He’s gonna make it, right?”

A pause. “Yeah. But we need to get him help fast.” A soft swear. Silence.

“I’m fine.” The words left his mouth automatically, but the bitter taste stayed. “I’m fine”, he repeated, forcing himself to believe it. Forcing himself to open his eyes, he pushed himself up. Someone made a noise of pain, and he vaguely realized it was his own voice. He slumped.

“Okay, new plan. I’ll carry Lance out of here. Pidge gets us inside, Keith and Hunk cover us. That means we only have two guns for five people, so try to be careful.” Lance felt the ache of guilt in his gut, almost as painful as the gunshot.

“My middle name is careful, Shiro.” Hunk quipped. Lance wanted to laugh because it was such a cheesy thing to say, and Hunk’s middle name was definitely not careful. He cracked the smallest of smiles. A hand settled gently on his shoulder.

“Hold tight, dude.” The hand slipped away. There was more talking, working out specifics Lance didn’t have the capacity to understand. He wanted to sleep. He had started dozing off when Shiro nudged him back to reality.

“We’re almost there, Lance. I’m gonna pick you up now, okay?” Lance managed a nod and Shiro wrapped his arms around him. He knew Shiro was being as gentle as he could, but it still hurt and he couldn’t stifle a small cry.

“Sorry,” Shiro said. Lance shook his head. Shiro wasn’t the asshole that shot him. Shiro wasn’t the idiot that got himself shot. Shiro carried him bridal style and, through the jostling, Lance realized he was getting blood all over his chest. He made a mental note that if he got out of there alive, he’d find a way to get the stains out. He felt like a little kid who had fallen asleep on the couch or in the car and was being carried to bed. And then somehow they were out of the tunnel, artificial light dipping over his eyelids. It suddenly felt so much easier to breathe now that the walls weren’t squeezing him to death. His eyes flickered open and closed, like snapshots of a movie where some of the frames were missing. Pidge shouted something, Shiro froze, a gunshot rang out, and then they kept moving. More missing frames. He buried his face in Shiro’s shoulder, brow furrowed in pain.

“Don't fall asleep on me now, Lance.” For a confused second he thought Shiro might actually be mad at him for falling asleep in his arms. He tried to say something, but he felt so tired. When he lifted his head, the vertigo hit him hard. He held tighter to Shiro.

He couldn’t tell how long Shiro carried him, time becoming a blur of movement measured in stops and shaking. He heard people yelling, Shiro swearing under his breath. Lance was so, so scared. For everyone. Shame and terror churned in his stomach. And then he was being set down against a wall, and his eyes fluttered open.

“It’s okay Lance. I just gotta get the door open okay? We’re getting out of here.”

“Where’re the oth’rs?” He slurred it, looking around.

“They’re fine, they went to the control room. We’re getting to the lions first.” Shiro reassured. His voice sounded so even and calm, but Lance caught the tiny shake of his hands as he rubbed his shoulders. They wait in uneasy silence, Shiro whispering “Come on, Pidge.” And then the guard came around the corner behind Shiro. Their gun was already drawn.

Lance choked out Shiro’s name, and was somehow on his feet before he knows what he was doing. He ended up between Shiro, and the gun. The guard squeezed the trigger.

Shiro yelled out as Lance dropped back to the ground. Pain flashed hot white in his shoulder. He couldn’t catch his breath. There was another yell that cuts off abruptly, and then Shiro was back at his side.

“Lance, look at me.” Hands pressed at the new wound, and he hissed in pain, tears streaming down the side of his face. “Lance, why would you do that?” Shiro sounded on the verge of hysterics. Lance didn’t know how to answer him, didn’t know why he was so upset.

“You gotta- get ev’rybody out of here Shiro... You’re more-”

“I’m getting you out of here too, Lance.”  

“I just…” He opened his eyes for a moment, words choked by a sob. Shiro’s stared at him, horrified. He shut his eyes. “I just thought- You’re more important, Shiro. ‘S okay if I get- hurt.”

“Lance…” Shiro’s voice cracked, and Lance hated himself for making Shiro break like this. Before either can say anything more, the door beeps. Shiro lifted Lance up again, pushing through the door, running. Lance devoted all his strength to clinging to him, arms wrapped around his neck. He could hear Shiro’s accelerated heartbeat, and his own pounded in his ears slowly. So goddamn slow.  

The next thing he knew, he was in the black lion.

Shiro set up the comms and pulled down a first aid kit.

“Pidge? Keith, Hunk? You guys there?” There’s no answer and Shiro mumbled under his breath before diving to his knees next to Lance. In any other situation, Lance would be pretty excited to be inside another lion. They were all mostly identical on the inside, but inside a lion, you could just feel their presence, their quintessence. In any other situation Lance would be excited, but Shiro was starting on his shoulder, and his attention was blinked away by the pain.

There's a yell over the comm.

“Shiro, you there?” Shiro’s head snapped up at Pidge’s voice.

“Yeah, yeah we're here!”

“Is Lance okay?” Hunk chimed in to the comms. Lance faded in and out of consciousness.

“I'm patching him up right now. He should be okay until we can get him to a pod. He…” Shiro trailed off, unsure.

“What? What's wrong?” Keith was there now too. In a dreamlike state, Lance imagined them all clustered around him, sitting in the common room at the castle.

“He took a bullet for me.” The dream came crashing down. Lance wished so badly to black out, not just from the pain of Shiro pulling away bloodsoaked fabric, and pressing in bandages, but from the embarrassment of the conversation.

“What?”

“A guard got the jump on us while we were waiting on Pidge.” A small swear from Pidge before Shiro continued, “I- I should have been paying attention, but Lance got between us.” Shiro’s hands trembled briefly on Lance’s shoulder.

There was yelling suddenly, and the stunned silence breaks into the sounds of action and guns.  Shiro moved quicker. The last thing Lance remembered was muttering an apology, and Blue roaring inside his head from some distant place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was my fav chapter im screamin r u screamin??


	5. coming up for air

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> take a deep breath kiddos and dive on in

The pods were slightly too warm, and slightly too cold all at once. A familiar hum, inaudible from the outside, stirred him awake. The pod hissed open, and he fell out on shaky legs. It was dark, but there were shapes sitting all around that he realized were the other paladins, after a moment. It must have been the middle of the night, or as close as you can get in space. There were blankets scattered about, and draped over everyone. He was a little offended that they never had sleepovers like that when he was around. The room was chilly, and he sat down to save his bare feet from the cold floor. Everyone looked so calm. He wondered how long he was out. Everything ached, but in a good way. Like when you wake up after a really good nap in a really cramped position. Which was basically what happened. 

His shoulder and side ached more than anything else, though. He didn’t have to peek under the suit to know he had scars to match the large star shaped one on his back, and the numerous little healed over cuts that littered his body. Scars weren’t as romantic as he used to think. They didn’t really make you seem more handsome or daring. They just made you feel a little sad, like you lost something. He remembered being little, playing with his siblings, falling out of a tree, and getting stuck by a branch on the way down. It had only needed a few stitches, and everyone in class had thought it was cool, in a morbid sort of way that only little kids could understand. But from then on he was more vulnerable, more mortal, and he didn't climb trees often.

Scars weren’t as bad as words though. He thought about the things he said, the things they said, however long ago that was. It feels like it was years ago. That would be funny, to have slept in the pod for years, keeping everyone waiting. If it wasn't for the light snoring, it would be like they had turned into statues. He suddenly felt very odd sitting there watching them sleep. Like he didn't belong to the little stone garden they made. Besides, he was starving. The pods always left you feeling drained, like you just donated to a blood drive. The thought of blood made him a little queasy as he stood up and left the room as quietly as he could. 

He sat in the kitchen and ate until he felt better, though his cooking wasn’t as good as his mother's, or Hunk’s. He took a shower, hesitating in the mirror before tracing the scars with his eyes and fingertips.

He roams the castle, getting used to moving again. He wanted to be outside somewhere with fresh air and open skies. All he got, when he stared out the window, was a very small and lonely feeling.

He found his way back to the pod room and sat again. He thought of what to say to them in the morning. What would they say? He wanted to take back everything, leave it all unsaid. The only good thing to come out of it was the kiss from Keith, but he felt anxious about even that now. He didn’t want them to know how weak he was, how weak he’d gotten. They were all so strong. He didn’t want to come clean about everything. A very small part of him wished he had died.  It was a terrible thing to feel. Because he wanted to live! He wanted to live so badly it hurt sometimes. But he thought about what he said to Shiro. He was nearly delirious from pain and blood loss sure, but was it true? Did he really think he didn’t deserve to live as much as the rest of them? He watched their forms in the dark. Hunk and Pidge leaned against each other. What he said in the courtroom was true. They were geniuses. Pidge was older than her age, and Hunk was the nicest person he’s ever met. They could probably build their way out of any shitty situation. Lance sometimes had trouble with the toaster. Coran and Allura were huddled together too, one blanket spread across their shoulders. Coran was goofy but in a good way, a way no one could ever get annoyed at. Plus, he was an expert in Altean engineering. Allura was strong, a diplomat, and she was leading a rebellion! Lance couldn’t argue he was better than them. Keith was lying on his side, closer to the pod. For one, he was half-alien. That was just bonus cool points. He was also much better at hand-to-hand combat, his instincts were faster, he was the team’s fighter. He had a shit taste in fashion though, so Lance gave himself one point. Then there was Shiro, leaning against a control panel, directly across from Lance. Shiro was their leader. Shiro was… capable. He knew how to compromise and come up with plans. He could fix problems. He could, well, lead. 

He knew what Pidge said, back at the courtroom. He knew they all liked him, at least a little. But… Lance was just a boy from Cuba. Lance was just a kid. Lance talked too much, and got into trouble. He wasn’t anything special, and he just wanted to go home. 

He was burying his face in his knees, trying not to cry. To fully realize and admit to yourself how much you actually matter? That’s difficult. And it hurt. It hurt so much, like a black hole in your chest. Sitting in the dark, surrounded by people better than you, knowing in your heart that the only thing you’re good at was jumping in front of bullets. It was impossible not to cry.

So he does. Quietly. Alone. Heartbroken.

 

He woke up to a hand on his shoulder shaking him gently. Voices trembled with excitement, his name an echo through the room. He was cold, and sore from being curled up for so long. But Hunk was pulling him out of his shell into a standing hug. He held Lance like he might break, like he couldn’t believe he was there. The others piled on, instantly surrounding him with warmth. A laugh bubbled out of him as his feet dangle above the ground, and he wiped sleep from his eyes.

“When did you wake up?”

“How do you feel?”

“Did you watch us sleep?”

The questions overlap. There was so much noise for only six people. The laughter faded away, and they set him back down again, looking expectantly. 

“I woke up last night. How long was I out?” He scratched the back of his head, unable to meet their eyes. 

“Six quintants” “About a week” Coran and Pidge answered at the same time. 

“That long, huh? Sorry to keep you waiting.” He laughed again, forced. 

“You were shot twice Lance.” Keith killed the smile Lance had plastered over his face. He stared at the ground. 

“I mean…” He shrugged. “It’s not like I wanted to get shot.”

“Lance.” Shiro spoke, and Lance looked up unconsciously. He felt like he was getting scolded, even though none of them sounded mad. They sounded confused, even… sad?

“Are you okay man?” 

“You know you’re important to us, right?”

Lance had intertwined his fingers, and squeezed so hard he couldn’t feel anything else. He couldn’t think of what to say. There was a bubble in his ribs that he held onto so tight, trying not to burst. 

“I- I’m fine.” It doesn’t sound as reassuring as he was trying to make it sound. He can barely get the words out of his throat. He was not fine. Why the  _ fuck _ would he be fine? But he couldn’t do this. He couldn’t-

“Lance…” Keith sounded so quiet. He took a step toward Lance. The bubble bursts.

He sank to his knees, covering his face. He blubbered apologies, wanting so badly for them to leave it alone, leave him alone. There was a moment of hesitation on their part. Then they were  at his side again, warm hands on his shoulders, resting on his back, just holding him. He shook, feeling pathetic, and so relieved to let it all go at the same time. No one said anything. He cried until he felt like there’s nothing left in him. Just hollow space. He wiped his face with his sleeve as he sat up. There was sniffling from everyone. He tried to speak, through hiccups.

“I just- You’re all so much-”

“Stop saying that. You don’t even know how much you mean to us, Lance.” Shiro was crouched in front of him. 

“B-but I don’t even- I’m not good. A-at anything!” 

“Lance, you’ve saved my life so many times I can’t even count!” Pidge grabbed his arm, not roughly. 

“And you’re my best friend Lance.”  Hunk clapped his back. “I don’t even know how I would have made it through the garrison without you, dude.” 

Allura stepped closer to the circle. “Despite myself, I must admit you also have quite a bit of charm.” She made a face at him, and he laughed, small and shaky. 

“You’re the best shot, honestly.” 

“You have the deepest connection with your lion. Blue fucking loves you dude. You should see how she’s been acting while you were out.”

“I swear every alien we meet falls in love with you, whether you’re trying or not.”

The compliments and stories piled on, each with a nudge at his side or squeeze of his hand, until he was laughing, and the emotion was threatening to overflow again.

He swiped at his eyes, and swallowed a lump in his throat. “Thanks. I don’t know, I mean- I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. We love you, Lance. We couldn’t do anything without you.”

“You’re irreplaceable.” Those were the words that really did make the tears spill over. But he laughed. The pit in his stomach had been replaced by that warm feeling. And then there was a hand on his cheek. 

The kiss this time was softer, and he smiled against Keith’s mouth. They pull away, breathless and beaming.

“You really should have told me sooner.”

“Get a room!” 

“Aww, lovebirds!” Pidge and Hunk teased them with smiles and stuck their tongues out.

And then Shiro rested a hand on Lance’s head, ruffling his hair. Lance smiled at them all, feeling weightless for the first time in a long time. 

“Thank you.”

 

...

 

“Try not to get shot anymore.”

 

“What happens with the Eb?”

Allura didn’t hear him enter, but she doesn’t jump at the sound of his voice. 

“Hm? Oh, we already took care of that.” She smiled, and he raised an eyebrow. “While you were out.” She chuckled to herself quietly before continuing. It was all very matter-of-fact.

“The team was understandably quite upset when they got back, and so was I when they told me everything. I think furious would be the right word. So, I delivered an ultimatum.”

“Jeez. Which was?”

“Surrender to negotiations or I’ll send my Lions to sort it out.” She said it with the regal, intimidating air of a queen, though her lips quirked up at the corner, and he could see the princess beneath. 

“A very easy decision on their part.” 

“Yes, it was. I revised their entire government in a single afternoon. It’s much less… perverse now.”

“Impressive.” 

“Glurb, of course, could not be pardoned, but that’s all over and done with.”

“And Blip?” He’d been wondering about them since he woke up. 

“Alive.” She smiled at him, like she knew he’d been worried.

He hip-checked her, and she elbowed him in the ribs back. It was only a slight nudge, but he stumbled away, clutching his side over the scar, and hissed in pain. She threw her hands up.

“Oh- Oh my, are you okay, I’ll go get Coran, I’m so sorry-” She paused when she saw his shoulders shaking. He started laughing outright. “Wha-”

“I’m fine, princess! The pods fixed me right up.” She blinked, and he put up his hands up.

Suddenly she was pulling him into a headlock. And to his surprise, she was actually laughing too. He struggled against her grip halfheartedly, laughing too much to really protest. It reminded him of roughhousing with his siblings. After a moment, he went limp, dragging her down to the floor. She released him, and they collapsed into a fit of giggles. If anyone had come in, and asked them what was so funny, they wouldn’t know what to say. They laughed at nothing, at the entire universe, at every absurd thing that had happened to them out here in the void of space. They laughed in the face of heartache. That’s the one thing they had in common.

 

When they were finally breathless and quiet, they stared out the window at the stars. There were no more words. No more bad jokes and noogies. They just sat, for a long while. And then she kissed the top of his head, and left too. 

He remembered the very small and lonely feeling he’d had earlier, looking out at these same stars. It was gone. Now? Now he felt…

Whole. Important. Full. Of love, of courage. Full of endless blue skies and sunbeams that threatened to burst from his chest. Full of hope. And yeah, he was still scared, still homesick as fuck. But none of it was going to crush him anymore. Because he was a boy from Cuba. And he was going to keep trying. 

He’s good at that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you've enjoyed this ride, and if you have go check out my other works, because they are all lance angst B)  
> Also pls consider leavin a comment, it takes just a sec and it makes me so super happy to get them! Tell me your fav part or something! Have a nice day!

**Author's Note:**

> draw,,,, draw fanart,,,,,, tag me in it on tumblr @babitty,,,, tahnks


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